This post is by Anthony Savage of Sparta Health
Being loved is one of the most basic human needs.
We all crave love, safety, being admired, and cared for. When those needs aren’t met for a very long time, our ability to live a healthy, fulfilling life gets affected. We begin to search for alternative solutions and get the feelings of happiness, joy, belonging, safety, hope, positive energy, or enthusiasm from artificial sources such as drugs or alcohol. That’s where the danger begins.
Practicing self-love is about getting in touch with ourselves, our wellbeing, and our happiness and it’s the first step to being able to love others.
“Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others. Self-love means not settling for less than you deserve.” [1]
The Importance of Self-Love
It won’t be an exaggeration to say that everything starts INSIDE us. Without self-acceptance and self-love, it’s not possible to achieve true happiness or form a healthy, stable relationship with another person.
- The first step to loving yourself is accepting the fact that nobody is perfect. We all struggle with our insecurities, bad habits, and things we would like to improve.
- It’s crucial to take time to fully get to know yourself, understand who you are, and accept all your flaws and imperfections. Knowing your strengths and weaknesses helps not only to navigate life, but also allows you to accept yourself for who you truly are—a valuable human being that is full of amazing capabilities as long as they believe in themselves, accept their true self, and work on developing their strengths.
- Remember that self-love, just like everything else, is a process and sometimes it’s not as easy as it seems. Be patient and take small steps in the right direction. Don’t get discouraged by setbacks; they are all part of the journey.
- Once you accept who you are, nothing from the outside world can threaten your confidence or identity—and that’s exactly why self-love is so crucial to our mental health and wellbeing. Once you establish a confident and secure relationship with yourself, it’s something that nobody can take away from you. No matter how hard the circumstances, you will always find strength and courage to deal with life challenges.
“Self-compassion and self-love are largely used interchangeably in specialized literature. Research shows that having more self-compassion builds resilience in the face of adversity, helping people to recover quicker from trauma or romantic separation. It also helps us to better cope with failure or embarrassment.” [2]
- The process of acceptance and self-care is based on a strong belief that you deserve to have a good life. You will begin to develop a new you: stronger, more confident, and worth not only yours but another person’s love as well.
- If you are not happy with who you are and always complain about your life circumstances, you may start looking for various ways to escape reality. This process can be gradual and includes several types of coping mechanisms, one of them being substance abuse. Don’t ever go down that path!
Simple Ways to Self-Acceptance
If you want to establish a positive relationship with yourself, you should have a couple of daily affirmations that will make you feel confident and good about yourself. A simple but effective task to try is to find something that you like about yourself. Focus on that feature every time you see yourself in the mirror.
Have something uplifting written in your bedroom; a little reminder to have a great day every single morning when you wake up. You will be surprised how effective those little things can be if repeated on a regular basis.
Make sure you get enough rest, meditate, take an hour or so every day and spend it doing what you truly enjoy. When you are stressed and tired, you won’t see anything (including yourself) in a good light.
Learn to listen to your body, understand what it may need, and focus on all aspects that you like about yourself. Take care of both your mind and body by exercising a couple of times per week and spending enough time outdoors.
Meditation, relaxation techniques, and daily exercise are part of a healthy lifestyle—they provide natural ways to control your emotions, keep you balanced, and get rid of accumulated negative energy or stress.
“Mindfulness can help us to relearn, as adults, to take pleasure in fundamental, everyday things that we used to enjoy spontaneously as children. Reacquainting ourselves with pleasure in this way is an essential component of self-kindness.” [3]
Loving Your Life
The first big step in the process of self-love is acceptance and responsibility. The next one is practicing gratitude. Learn to focus on positive aspects of your reality and appreciate every little blessing that you already have in your life.
If you put enough effort and energy into working on a positive mindset and keep improving your circumstances, one day you will get into a very blissful state of fully loving yourself and the life you are living. You will also understand that in order to get there, you don’t need to be perfect.
“Most of us in the Western world have been raised to believe that perfectionism is a great quality to have. After all, being obsessed with perfect details leads to perfect work, and this personality trait gives us the opportunity to humblebrag during job interviews. In reality, however, perfectionism is bad for you. Not just “not ideal” or “harmful when excessive,” but actively bad. Like cigarettes or obesity.” [4]
There is a very interesting theory saying that love is already inside us. All we need to do is awaken it and in order to do that our life doesn’t need to be perfect.
Start the journey to self-love today. Small steps, choosing love every single day and discovering your inner strength that you didn’t even know existed. It’s really worth it!
About Anthony Savage
Anthony Savage is the Medical Services Manager at Sparta Health, having joined the team in 2017 and is responsible for the overall operational delivery of our high-quality services to our clients. He has a solid background in workplace physiology, health, safety and wellbeing, as well as over 12 years of delivering, and holding senior management positions, for leading rehabilitation and return to work support providers.
He is known for his innovative approach in his design and execution of services and his ability to forging strong relationships.
References
- Brain & Behavior Search Foundation, Self-Love and What It Means, https://www.bbrfoundation.org/blog/self-love-and-what-it-means
- Medical News Today, Why self-love is important and how to cultivate it, https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321309
- Medical News Today, Why self-love is important and how to cultivate it, https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321309
- Medical News Today, Why self-love is important and how to cultivate it, https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321309